21 deep questions.

this was suggested by a fellow blogger and i havent blogged in weeks. so what better reason to.

1. What is more difficult for you; looking into someone’s eyes when you are telling someone how you feel, or looking into someone’s eyes when they are telling you how they feel?
neither. i always like to make eye contact when it comes to serious stuff. it helps me know who i can trust.

2. Think of the last time you were REALLY angry.
i haven't really been THAT mad in a long time. But Lainey's birthday comes to mind. I was sick with strep throat, & had absolutely no sleep, Casey left me to go play golf. Sounds stupid now, but being pregnant & super emotional had a huge part in it. 

3. You are on a flight from Honolulu to Chicago non-stop. There is a fire in the back of the plane. You get enough time to make ONE phone call. Who would you call?
wow. this question really just went there. if i was alone, i'd call my mom first & just tell her that i loved her & i;d prob be as quick as i could & then call casey. there's no way I'd be able to say everything I needed to say. my main concern would be letting them know how much i love them. and that my children would be taken care of.

4. You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?
when they said deep questions, they meant it.

a) i would tell my mother, & try to help her deal with the fact that she was about to loose another person that is close to her. i would never hide that from her, because she's been threw so much concerning death in the past few years. more than any person ever should really.
b) i would spend every single second with my children. that's the easiest question ive ever had to answer. I dont care about going to hawaii, sky diving, or anything like that. there's nothing i HAVE to see before my time here is up. I would just want to be with my babies and my husband. & just hold them, try to give them an idea of how much they mean to me.
c) yes & no. scared of the unknown, what my children would be like or have to deal with. I wouldnt be there for school, proms, ball games, their weddings.  scared of dying>no. I have faith in where i will go, & who will be there with open arms. 

5. You can have one of the following two things: trust/love.love. hands down. 

6. You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

odds are, i'd never even see the dog. i'd be mad i was having to walk.

7. If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?on a honeymoon with my husband. we never got to do that. i dont really care where, i'd just want to be with him. even if it was a tent in the middle of nowhere.   we never get to be alone, but it's not really a problem because we love our child & wouldnt trade a second we've had with her for anything in this world. however, it would be nice just to take a little time off from our responsibilities & just breathe, together. If someone offered me a trip to anywhere, I'd either say ancient rome, or the mayan temples. im a history buff & those two cultures get me excited.

8. Think of the last person who you really knew that died. You have the chance to give them 1 hour of life back, but you have to give one year of your life. Do you?
my grandfather. & to be honest, I'd give him a whole year of my life. Im not sure he'd want it though. He's happier where he is & i know that for a fact. He is with my grandmother, right where he belongs. On another note, If i had a choice who I got to bring back, it'd be my grandmother Lucy, or my mamow Ruth.(sorry Granddaddy, but i know you wouldnt even want to) I'd love to just sit with them, just for a little while and just talk. ask questions. let them meet Lainey. beg my mamow to teach me to sew. i'd just want to talk with them about life in general. They both passed when I was at the age that I thought I knew everything & couldnt learn anything from them. in reality, I knew absolutely nothing & could learn everything from them. damnit.

9. Are you the kind of friend that you would want to have as a friend?
absolutely. one thing i can say about myself is that i am a VERY loyal friend. if youre my friend, i will always be there, no matter what, no questions asked. i tell my friends the truth even if it's not what they want to hear. 

10. Does love = sex?

i'm not too sure i understand the question. if you love someone does that mean you have sex with them? no. i love many people that i do not have sex with. i think the question was supposed to be does sex equal love. The answer is still no. however, i do believe sex is only supposed to be shared between a couple who have love. really im too fat for it & i could care less about it right now. i think it's too public and glorified these days, sex should always be a private matter.  

11. Your best friend dies, what would you do?

why is this whole thing about death??

i would cry my eyes out & fly home as fast as i could. to hug tami because that would mean she just lost her daughter. & really i'd try to explain to courtnay the way I knew lindsay and how she should strive to be just like her. 

12. When and how was the last time you told someone HONESTLY how you felt?
i try to tell casey how i feel about him everysingle day. I also tell my daughter, but she doesnt really understand yet.

13. What would be harder for you, to tell someone you love them or that you do not love them back?
not.
“i..i think i love you”
“oh…uhhhhh……………………………hmmm…thanks??…..”
tell me that isnt an awkward moment.

14. What do you think would be the hardest thing for you to give up on?sweets/desserts, mt.dew. 

15. Excluding romantic love, when was the last time you told someone you loved them?
i dont love lainey in a romantic way. so this morning, about 100 times already.

16. If you had to go back in time and change one thing, if you HAD to, even if you had “no regrets” what would it be?
school. & all the problems I personally caused between casey & i.

18. Would you give a homeless person CPR if they were dying?
i dont even know how really. i took a class once, in 8th grade. I remember nothing. 

17. Imagine. It is a dark night, you are alone, it is raining outside, you hear someone walking around outside your window. Who do you call?
…

i probably wasnt supposed to, but i did notice that 17 & 18 were reversed. & if i was seriously scared enough i'd call security forces.....after i called my husband to get their number.

19. Are you old fashioned?
more & more everyday.

20. Which would you choose, true love with a guarantee of a heart break or have never loved before?im going to assume that based on all these questions about love and whatnot, whoever wrote up this survey is someone who was recently hurt by his/her significant other and wants the whole freakin world to choose the “right” answer by writing: LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE
for every answer. or something like that.

21. If you could do anything OR wish for anything that would come true, what would you wish?really, money. i know thats selfish but i'd ask for a lot. so casey wouldnt have to work & i wouldnt have to go to school, to eventually work. We could spend the day with our babies.