Two weeks will make it a year.
A year since my life became worth living.
I would read mother's words, as they wrote about their children, about their journey- it was so incomprehensible to me. how could someone find it "okay" to change "#2 diapers". how spit up was okay to wear like if it was an accessory. two hours of sleep would be considered sufficient? what had i gotten myself into?
i don't think i've ever worked as hard as i have this past year. I cant remember what it's like to choose which position i sleep in, to take a long bath- uninterrupted, or to eat a meal without first considering another's hunger.
and it's all a beautiful place to find yourself in. selfishness, the kind you didnt even know dwelt within you, is pulled out like a string by a beautiful little girl. the amazing happiness my heart feels when she says mama, or by just watching her smile at her daddy.
the feeling that rushed throughout my body, heart, & soul when i first gazed into her eyes. the way my heart flutters when her frizzy head lifts from the pillow each morning just to smile at her mother.
that is what life is about.
and it all comes from the lord. who has saved me, made my heart new, blessed me with this undeniable happiness, welcomed me into an eternal family to dwell in an everlasting city, with a resurrected body - to forever gaze upon His beauty.
this is my life.
the love i have for lainey. the closeness & happiness i have with casey. the joy i find in our family. the excitement & wonder that comes with this new baby.- these are only a small glimpse of what is to come in my life.
how blessed i am to have this. to never deserve it, not even worthy of anything close to it . but the Lord has given it all.
thank you.
the words dont even seem sufficient.
praise the lord & his love for his children, his gracious gift to share that love with us.
no one is worthy, but yet we all are blessed with this amazing gift.
No comments:
Post a Comment